Girl, you’re a fucking dragon. You’re hot as fuck, bitch.

That’s nothing. Breast feeding is the real danger zone.

One time my wife was feeding one of our kids and she said something like, “Damn, these hormones. I don’t know why but breast feeding fills me with rage. Like, I could actually stab you with this [points at knitting needle] .”

She wasn’t visibly upset. She was calm and cool like she is 99.99% of the time. But the fact that she even mentioned it means I came way closer than I would like to having my nice little nap in the recliner interrupted by a knitting needle to the face.