You have a very US-American centrist view. European conservatives will sometimes be to the left of US-Democrats. Conservatism is relative to the society, it wants to generally preserve things how they are (again, very basic human experience if you ask me) - just happens that in the USA things rather suck for quite a lot of people.
Funny indeed, but can happen to the best of us.
So in your opinion conservatism is not a valid political ideology? Or what is your conclusion. Since conservatives are part of our society and always will be and in a democracy we have to work with them.