The Onion and its six-member editorial board do not listen to outsiders. Nor do we listen to data, facts, polls, the U.S. government, or the widely panned Geneva Conventions.
deleted by creator
Suckers bet, I’m not taking it.
How will you be able to tell? His speeches are so incoherent! Hahqhahqha
Hahq tuah
I want people to send this to him now!
Joe Biden may be young by Washington standards
They really aren’t pulling their punches!
The whole thing is brilliant. The Onion has been on fire lately.
But The Onion and its six-member editorial board do not listen to outsiders. Nor do we listen to data, facts, polls, the U.S. government, or the widely panned Geneva Conventions.
I love it.
Finally someone said it. I’m tired of the country of Geneva enforcing its conventions on me and how I approach wars.
Stop telling me what color shapes I can and cannot use, Geneva!
Calm down Canada.
/c/NCD leaking
I guess none of you noticed the editorial board has a signature from Ted Kaczynski, aka Unabomber.
Its a reoccurring gag.
I have never actually read The Onion, I just like seeing their headlines.
There’s some fun articles. Although I think they frequently drag on a little too long for a gag given my preference for not reading more than a few paragraphs at a time.
I need to wake up. I went to sleep drunk, I woke up feeling still drunk.
I read your username as “DopeSalad”
Thats not even CLOSE!
Don’t worry. It’s nothing serious anyways. There is a band named Hopesfall. I thought it was dumb so I came up with that.
They’re now in newspaper format again, if that helps!
Sure. Just a joke.
༼ つ ◕_◕ ༽つ
pretty incredible that they managed to get his signature even though he’s dead
That’s only of you listen to data. Stop listening to data.
upset at myself for taking a whole 10 seconds to get the joke
It took me like 15 😭
I’m a Republican who Does Her Own Research and I TOLD you Libtards that Biden was still in the Race! The whole Kamala thing was a SHAM! HOW can they Endorse Biden if he isn’t running STUPIDS!
I’m glad Americans are finally waking up. Biden may not be perfect, but he is the only candidate who can beat Trump. I’ll be doing my part by voting for him as many times as possible this November!
Lest readers doubt the value of our endorsement, we ask them to remember 2016, when voter complacency almost put Hillary Clinton in the White House before The Onion stepped in.
We really dodged a bullet on that one! (/j)
The Onion wanted to play on hard mode. How do you write satire when that shit head was in the White House?
I’m not even American but I’ve already voted for Joe Biden several times. Just wrote the name down on pieces of paper and mailed them off. Adressed them to Joe Biden too, so that shit counts double. Put some extra stamps on them, and that’s exponential growth in the number of times I voted for him. I’m practically a swing state of my own, the way I’m swinging my massive votes around.
screenshotting this and sending it to fox news as an admission of guilt
I’m very afraid some maga is going to read this comment and take it seriously.
Im writting in Joe Biden this november
Did you forget to ask someone?
But a vote for Joe Biden is a vote for Trump!
Based, thank you for your vote
I think Internet Explorer is in for him too.
I’m voting Netscape Navigator. Lesser evil.
Netscape was never lesser or evil.
Naw, they’re rooting for Eisenhower.
He’s all the buzz on AIM right now.
Hell yeah I’m writing him in
Ted Kazinski?
You might know him for his academic papers.
Among other works
you joke but this is how he’s brightly discussed in some circles lol I have seen some concerning publications that refer to him as uncle Ted and other light-hearted names in a similar context
Seems like it’s up there with the killdozer Fandom. Casual terrorism… Or living the American dream?
terrorism is the American dream, why else would we worship 9/11 and sadam husane?
And his cake having tendancies
Yeah, the mathematician. What about him?
!it’s a running gag for the onion!<
Tap for spoiler
Hmm
I used:
::: spoiler Tap for spoiler hidden content :::That’s what I used and it works on my app
Whatever you’re using seems to take the > as a comment immediately
I’m using Voyager iOS, but checked this out from a browser.
Looks like this method:
>! spoiler !<doesn’t work on our (yours & my) instance, nor Midwest Social:
Interesting that Join-Lemmy.org advocates for the format I previously showed in a code block:
yet your client supports the “greater than exclamation point” method. It makes me wonder whether your client should support it.
(Lots of folks like that method though per Lemmy GitHub!)
Which client you using? I’ll share this comment with them.
That was the Reddit spoiler tag, so I’m guessing they’re using one of the ex-reddit clients that pivoted to Lemmy during the great migration.
Either Sync, Boost, Eternity, or… the other one I couldn’t remember the name of.
Removed by mod
This is a great joke! It took me a second even after I saw the source. Well done!
