Thanks so much for sharing this story and with such detail, what a sobering look into exactly the turning point in her life and how things could’ve gone instead. It shows how things fall apart for so many. That was a lot of support she needed to recover, and I think you made it pretty clear that most folks are not going to be getting that. You also made it clear that with enough support she was able to bounce back and seriously recover, which is fantastic.
These are the kinds of outcomes our society should be striving towards! Not vacations and luxuries for executives and investors.
I don’t want to give the kind of detail you did, but my upbringing could probably be described as a near miss along these lines. Grew up as my family’s finances were going from bad to hopeless and dangerous (no heat or AC sometimes, certainly no healthcare outside of broken bones, etc. etc.). Parents split, mother died slowly to terminal cancer, younger sister from another father lived alone with her and had to watch her unravel as a kid.
I was just old enough to realize “oh shit, there’s no one ever coming to help us, I have to get my life and future path together now, this is an emergency”. My sister wasn’t so lucky, she didn’t get any urgent realizations, she just got deep immovable trauma. She’s struggled since.
I was able to adopt her and raise her through teenage-hood as best I could, I wound up “adopting” my own father for some years to get him back on his feet too, later on (he’d long ceased parenting by then, though to his credit he helped my sister a lot, not even his kid).
I think if the timeline of all that shifted even just maybe two years in the wrong direction, I wouldn’t have been likely to make the realization when I did and build us the shield we needed. I think we all woulda just been fucked.
Neither my dad or sister are doing great, but they’re alive, housed (by their own efforts), somewhat healthy - able to continue the struggle for now. I’m doing pretty well, but the circumstances were different and I lucked into natural talent with tech, so. That’s the only reason any of my efforts were fruitful, anyway.
I’m glad I was able to really help someone and that you were able to make the best of your situation. The fact anyone has to worry in this day and age about affording medical care, heating/cooling, drinking water, clean air, etc drives me insane. I don’t know how someone can look at their neighbor suffer and either not care or think it’s actually a net positive. We could all be hurt, we could all end up lost, homeless, or stuck someplace unsafe.
Thanks so much for sharing this story and with such detail, what a sobering look into exactly the turning point in her life and how things could’ve gone instead. It shows how things fall apart for so many. That was a lot of support she needed to recover, and I think you made it pretty clear that most folks are not going to be getting that. You also made it clear that with enough support she was able to bounce back and seriously recover, which is fantastic.
These are the kinds of outcomes our society should be striving towards! Not vacations and luxuries for executives and investors.
I don’t want to give the kind of detail you did, but my upbringing could probably be described as a near miss along these lines. Grew up as my family’s finances were going from bad to hopeless and dangerous (no heat or AC sometimes, certainly no healthcare outside of broken bones, etc. etc.). Parents split, mother died slowly to terminal cancer, younger sister from another father lived alone with her and had to watch her unravel as a kid.
I was just old enough to realize “oh shit, there’s no one ever coming to help us, I have to get my life and future path together now, this is an emergency”. My sister wasn’t so lucky, she didn’t get any urgent realizations, she just got deep immovable trauma. She’s struggled since.
I was able to adopt her and raise her through teenage-hood as best I could, I wound up “adopting” my own father for some years to get him back on his feet too, later on (he’d long ceased parenting by then, though to his credit he helped my sister a lot, not even his kid).
I think if the timeline of all that shifted even just maybe two years in the wrong direction, I wouldn’t have been likely to make the realization when I did and build us the shield we needed. I think we all woulda just been fucked.
Neither my dad or sister are doing great, but they’re alive, housed (by their own efforts), somewhat healthy - able to continue the struggle for now. I’m doing pretty well, but the circumstances were different and I lucked into natural talent with tech, so. That’s the only reason any of my efforts were fruitful, anyway.
Edit: slightly more detail on outcomes
I’m glad I was able to really help someone and that you were able to make the best of your situation. The fact anyone has to worry in this day and age about affording medical care, heating/cooling, drinking water, clean air, etc drives me insane. I don’t know how someone can look at their neighbor suffer and either not care or think it’s actually a net positive. We could all be hurt, we could all end up lost, homeless, or stuck someplace unsafe.