So I grew up Protestant Christian, then about 14-15 years old. I became suicidal and wanted to take my own life. Then when calling upon god no one came, no feeling/emotions came. I was left in the tub with a blade to my wrist alone and as I was always told god would guide me. Though it felt like he abandoned me.

Though when in my life calling upon Satan. He actually came, the freedom feeling and love he radiated. With his dark maroon skin being 9ft tall and handsome. Otherwise I prefer pagan religions. Since for example god acts all perfect and loving but he wipes out ppl for only not believing in him. While the pagan gods yeah might do some fucked up shit but they don’t act nonhuman. Like Odin, Loki and others are just as human as we are but with maybe one special power.

I’ve called upon Odin, Loki and Dionysus.

Odin feels powerful and calming Loki feels Caregiving and Chaotic Dionysus feels, Loving, Happy and sexual nature.

Personally I’d rather worship a deity that is human rather than acting all perfect and loving while being the complete opposite.