Dick Cheney is alive and well. Just biding his time …

Nobody understands Finnegan’s Wake.

I’m running Fedora 40 on a Surface Pro 5. The problem is that you need a custom kernel for the Pro 5 and later. You can get the kernel from the Linux Surface GitHub page. Arch, Debian, Fedora, Opensuse Tumbleweed, Gentoo, and NixOS I think all have repos set up for it, so I’d recommend one of them. Fedora works for me, noting that there was a problem installing 39, so I had to install 38 and then upgrade. On 40 now, and it’s absolutely stable.

https://github.com/linux-surface/linux-surface/wiki/Installation-and-Setup