Have you been given jewelry that had some wackadoodle magical properties? Call the law offices of Gandalf and Gandalf and don’t settle for less than you deserve!

Worm 1: Something is walking up there, but in a nerdy way.

Worm 2: Nu-uh!!! Everyone knows our prey strolls casually around…or is a giant machine.

Worm 1: Didn’t one of the humans ride you around like a go cart?

Worm 2: Oh so you ALWAYS need to bring it up.

Cleveland rocks!

I once opened for the Melvins and had a killer fire extinguisher solo. I was warned not to return.

I would love a show where famous chefs have to microwave cheap meals to perfection with intense music in the background.

It is grand to live in the age where the secrets of the pizza lords are passed as easily as the wind blows into the trees.

In prison.

Butthole destroyed.

Make check on coin.

Massive loss in value.

No.

It’s some form of elvish.

“The language is that of Mordor, specifically the legal team giving the terms and conditions, Frodo.”

Relatable

Helicopter killing go cart.

I love needlessly long manga titles.

My cat launched a nuke and to stop it I married my plumber!

No worries!

(But there were indeed many worries.)

Under total weight I tons, you put “Yes.”

#1: Raise the banner of the Vanilla Ice Cream League!

I just want slightly irritated wife ambiance.

Damn. 10$ drive by tiddy must be on point.

“Is someone barking over here?”
That’s Information Security Operations, sir.
“Oh! Well tell them to carry on then.”

30 years go by. Retire. Live in quiet neighborhood. Phone rings. It’s the manager’s voice. Now it’s time to pay the price.

Ah, but this one goes BEEP.

Squad 1 will assault here, and Squad 2 will-
“Power up like in Dragon Ball Z. ^-”
It sure as hell will not!